In the beginning, I imagine, it was clear about which one of us people were referring to… If someone said Janet needs her diaper changed, I doubt there was any clarification needed. However, as time went on, and I was a child able to respond, it became apparent there would need to be some manner of distinguishing us. It may have been Grandpa Rae's decision (perhaps with guidance from Grandma herself) that he call for "Big Janet" if he needed her, and that I would be referred to as "Little Janet".
That served us well for many years… through the house at Canyon Lake, on various boats and into my teen years in Irvine, with them as our neighbors.
When I finally reached adulthood (and was for all intents and purposes as tall if not a hair taller) Grandma and I decided that perhaps we would switch to Janet S and Janet B. She also was the first to address me as Janet H upon my marriage to Robert.
Regardless of what I was called to distinguish my being from hers, I always wanted to grow up to be just like her. She had both quiet grace and a flash of fire when she needed it. As I grew older I realized what a rarity it was that she had traveled abroad and graduated from a prestigious college. Her ability to find numerous ways to entertain and teach was immense, her resourcefulness without limit.
That resourcefulness served her well throughout her life: war time rationing, small business ownership, parents to four outstanding children, self employment and community service were all taken in stride, with an emphasis on finding the right person for the job and matching talents to tasks.
When Rob and I learned we were expecting our first child, I bought a card for Grandma and Grandpa, with a notation that said you have always been wonderful grandparents, but soon you will be officially "GREAT". While Grandpa teased that he had always considered himself to be great, Grandma understood the message and was clearly tickled that she would soon have a new baby to nurture. When I learned we were expecting again, just 6 months into our new life as restaurant owners it was Grandma that said you will find the right person to help you, and told me of her challenges and the gifts of people and resources God put in her life at the times she needed them most. She assured me that there would be answers sent to help me through it. By this time my family had dubbed her Great Janet, and I no longer needed the distinction of a letter or adjective - I had become "Mom".
As Rob and I struggled through the many challenges of business ownership and raising small children she would often call with suggestions for us - had we tried this? Or maybe that? Always wanting to help us navigate the tricky road of balancing self employment with family time.
In recent years, she started her own not for profit enterprise for our family - Great Janet's clipping service. Frequently we would get envelopes filled with articles reflecting our individual talents and interests… We were kept well informed on the restaurant scene here in Orange County, as well as supplied with numerous recipes, and articles about teaching children with hands on projects - something she did so well when I was young.
I credit her with instilling in me a quest to learn - about others, about myself, about how to improve a product or service, and most challenging of all for me - to learn to care for others unconditionally, as there is good in every one of us, even if it's not readily apparent. So many people have told me these last several days that they never heard my grandmother say an unkind word about anyone... because of course, she never did.
The following verse is the perfect summation I gained from having had the privilege of growing up in her shadow:
Philippians 4:8-9 – Fix your thoughts on what is true and good and right. Think about things that are pure and lovely, and dwell on the fine, good things in others. Think about all you can praise God for and be glad about. Keep putting into practice all you learned from me and saw me doing, and the God of peace will be with you.
Vaya Con Dios, Great Janet. Thank you for everything, I love you very, very much.
